A midlife crisis is something that’s commonly heard or spoken of, but have you ever heard of a quarter life crisis? Well…that’s what I am currently experiencing and I must say it’s very confusing.

The quarter-life crisis is a period of uncertainty and questioning that typically occurs when people feel trapped, uninspired and disillusioned during their mid-20s to early 30s.

Bradley University

I just turned 25 over a month ago (yes I am still accepting gifts). Lately I have been feeling this uncertainty of where I want to be or how I want my life to go because usually I am a planner but when it comes to this I have never felt more lost than I do now.

In the past few months, I have scrolled Twitter, Instagram, Reddit…gosh and TikTok now. and whilst doing this I noticed I was doing this as a form of escapism. I know I have ”a lot to give” but when you know you have it but don’t know what to do with it, where to go and how to start? It’s a very distressing feeling. I felt, still feel lost but I’m also finding my way at the same time.

Most people will say ”No, I don’t compare myself to others” and most won’t. Still, when you see others achieving what you may have been wanting for a while, at that moment, you’re then reminded that you’re nowhere where you want to be, not even close, and that is gut-wrenching. Rest assured, you can still be happy for others while feeling this way because however your body and mind react at that moment is a normal human emotion, so don’t feel too bad about it.

Yes I’ve been green with envy? What? Are we pretending to not feel normal human emotions anymore…uhh…yeah we don’t do that over here.

Having these conversations is uncomfortable, especially in the age of social media. We grow up with adults telling us what you should and shouldn’t do, but now you’re the adult, but I must say 25-year-olds seemed way “adulteir” when I was a child than they do now. Well I am one now so…still. Some 25 Year old’s seem more put together and then there’s me, so I think. Some may relate, and others don’t. What I’ve learned is that everyone’s success comes at different stages.

I don’t think this is a motivational blog post, I’m simply saying I get it. I mean I have only been 25 for less than two months so who knows what else is ahead. I’m proud to say I graduated university in August (woohoo!), I am back to doing something I love which is writing/blogging honestly speaking, I never stopped writing. I have been journaling the past year but that’s a blog for another time.

In this life, do what ever you want. There’s absolutely nothing, anyone can do to stop you. If you want someone go for them, what’s the worst they can say? No..okay and then what? If you really want something, work hard towards it, it’s very cliche I know. It took me studying a month everyday to pass my driving theory test, after changing the date multiple times in one year due to firstly having no desire and then my anxiety, one day I was like no, I have to start driving around and through my anxiety I said “I HAVE TO! MULENGA YOU HAVE TO”, so, I studied and I passed the test.

All in all, no one knows what they are doing but we need one thing. Love. I know, again with the cliches I am on a roll! Love from a parent/guardian. Friends, a partner you’re romantically involved with, siblings, colleagues etc Authentic and genuine love because 20s are hard, and you can’t do it alone. “I don’t need nobody” excuse my vernacular but stop the cap.

Everybody needs someone and it’s okay to ask for help. I would not have gotten this far without the people around me and also me being a believer of God, I wouldn’t have gotten this far, so for that I am thankful. It’s just a quarter life crisis. We’ll all be okay. You’ll be okay, as long as you have self belief, the desire to learn and have good people around you, you’ll be okay. I’ll be okay. Here’s to our Twenties.