Today marks 29 years around the sun…well, there was no sun today because I live in the UK…BUT in Lusaka, the city I was born in, it was sunny today, so I guess that counts …right?…

Anyway, “becoming her” is a series I have been doing on TikTok, and today reminded me to practice gratitude consciously. Today is my 29th birthday, and I had one of the best birthdays, and all I did was stay in bed and reply to messages. Unfortunately, I have adenomyosis, which, to summarise,e means I experience extremely painful periods, which means I was stuck in bed, but though I was in physical pain,n my heart felt full.

As someone who writes about mental health and struggles with depression, I am prone to a lot of low moods, to the point that I was willing to go back on antidepressants, but yesterday I told myself, while I have that option, what if I started doing the things I loved again? Writing, skincare, plane spotting, etc. You see, the mind is a fascinating thing; it loves comfort too much, and depression can be comforting, but you have to fight back.

I cried today because I was so happy; loneliness often consumes, but today I was reminded of how loved I am. I guess that’s what I needed after all—love and comfort. I was told how much I am appreciated and how loved I am. I sat on my bed and told my brain, ” You see that? We are loved, we are not alone, never alone.” I am already a smiley person, but I laughed and smiled so much more today; here come the wrinkles, hello Botox! Just kidding..! Maybe when I am 65 or something

I simply wanted to say thank you. I am thankful for my parents, my brother, my friends, and even the strangers who wished me a happy birthday. I promise not to give up. I promise to prevail. Instead of getting back to myself, I have decided to get to know me again, better, and not to give up.

So please don’t give up either. Being an adult is tough; it sucks, I know, but pick up that phone and text someone or email me (wordsbymul@gmail.com), and if I am at capacity, I am willing to listen. 

Thank you to all my readers. I am still here, still healing, still advocating for mental wellness. Here’s to a new chapter and understanding mental health and life together. I am thankful for my twenty-somethings; now I am ready for the final chapter of my twenties. Who knows? Only time will tell. I am ready!