I initially went to therapy because I was in a situation that I couldn’t wrap my head around. I was emotionally and mentally drained. I had the worst crying spells and it got to a point my friends were tired of me talking about the same thing. My one friend who is not fond of therapy sat me down and said ”Mul, maybe it’s time for therapy?” I was thinking ??? ”EHH? MAYBE NOT. I AM FINE!!!”

If I were Pinocchio my nose would have elongated at such rapid speed, it would have fallen off. In that moment I was truly lying to myself and well, a week later or so I found myself a private therapist and it till this day it’s the best thing I have ever done for myself.

I had someone once whisper to me ”Oh, you can’t hang out today?.. ʸᵒᵘ ʰᵃᵛᵉ ᵗʰᵉʳᵃᵖʸ ᵈᵒⁿ’ᵗ ʸᵒᵘ?”

I laughed and asked her why we were whispering? I am not ashamed in admitting I need help. Had I not have gotten a therapist I surely wouldn’t be where I am today.

Being in therapy has been deemed as ”weak” in the past because it’s seen as a defeat, but in reality, it takes a lot of courage to say ”I’m not okay; I need help”. Why should I be hesitant to seek help to please everyone around me? For what? I am the one stuck in my mind; I am the one with the painful, heart-wrenching feelings; therefore, I will get the help I need, and I did. Thanks to my friend Qadan.

Therapy is uncomfortable because you are facing yourself, who you truly are, and the painful feelings you’ve kept within yourself. Some sessions left me feeling worse, and I questioned myself, ”Is this what I have been going through this whole time? Is this what I have to deal with?” But nothing in life that’s worth it is easy. Everything comes with a price, and the price was the discomfort I went through yesterday so that I could be comfortable with myself today.

When therapy is over, you’ll have those down moments, and if you still feel it’s too much, you can always go back; I have in the past. Healing is not linear. You’ll have moments of feeling defeated, but as long as you actively try to heal, it’s only up from there.

I quit therapy because I faced my problems head-on and sat in my discomfort; I then acknowledged that discomfort, felt it, dealt with it and worked around it many times until I could breathe again. Though I may sometimes gasp for air, I have finally learned to take each day as it comes and breathe.

I am glad I went to therapy because I found my way home back to myself.